My favorite thing ever is just your smile. its actually the best thing in the world it really makes me happy as shit to get one out of you. Second is  the sound of this specific laugh that you make...if I could attach a word to it, it would be  "delighted" I hope to give you many more reasons to flash that beautiful smile and laugh again in the future. (a man can dream right)

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There are a lot of ways I have changed since last time. For one, I stopped letting anger have any say in my life. The moodyness/whatever that was? Had to go. So I no longer do that. I have much better ways to handle myself now and it feels natural like how I used to be.

 
A simple one but a big one? The selfishness in all aspects. I stopped thinking with a selfish-forward approach in life. This one is pretty self explanatory I guess, being selfish sucks for anyone around you and also makes me feel like shit too. It's much better to be the opposite. It makes me feel good. And I wanna do that for you....I know better late than never though right?

I also stopped being so irresponsible with my finances.... I hated how much I put on you and when you told me how much you were working because of that, it was like a wake up call for me.  I should have been more responsible, taken care of myself, and worked on having more to support you with too.I knew I never wanted to hurt you again so I made sure to work on these things. 
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I had to get to the root of my problems which involved a lot of looking in the mirror and seeing where that came from. It was the guilt of me not doing the things I should've and taking it out on others. That's wholly unfair so I made sure to cut that out. It hurts me to realize I did this to you. I'm literally wincing as I type this because of how terrible that was of me, I can't stop saying sorry, sorry. I'll do better. I am doing better. Thats why I want to show you. To give you the positive best side of me.

I'm not perfect but I can learn, and when it involves something I care about deeply AKA You.....You can bet I'll make sure I get damned good at it.
 

I can only really convey so much via words and pictures. I've definitely changed a lot internally, too much to list here. It's a lot to explain-You'll have to see for yourself and if you do, I know you won't be disappointed.​

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It may feel scary to try again but I think it's worth it - We have always had something extra special, and I'm just compelled to fight for you, otherwise it feels like I would be letting destiny just pass by without even trying the best I can.

 

I have never once lied to you and I'm not about to start now. I think it was good that we broke up, (even though I was devestated at the time) because that gave me a lot of time to honestly assess what I did wrong. I needed to open my eyes and see that my behavior had become unacceptable. And it gave you a well deserved break from my bullshit. I never would have taken a hardcore approach to fixing my issues that you exposed to me - if I hadn't been so devestated from being apart from you. It was the motivation I needed to get my shit together. Being apart from you was hell but I waited until now to come to you because I wanted to be in a place where I am a benefit for you and your life, not a burden. It hurts every second being apart from you, but I know it's also what I needed to grow. I just wish it didn't have to be at your expense the way it went down. Now that I am in a much better place (I really tried to speedrun it to get here to you as fast as possible) We don't have to be apart and hurting like this. We can come together and everything will be so fixed/massively improved it will be like a dream now.  Together again, we become what the dream always was, because now I am functioning with the right headspace to play my part. We can be even stronger now...not ignoring or forgetting the past, but building and improving on it. I think we make a really great team, and we know each other so well, so uniquely. I'm not just saying it because it sounds good, it actually makes sense. I meant every word of what I have said with deep conviction. You don't have to take my word for it though, you are smart as hell and you know me - it won't be hard/take long for you to see whether or not I'm for real. You mean the absolute world to me, and I just want to show you that through my actions. not just words. 

 

Straight up...I'm pretty sure we are meant for  each other. Bold statement I know, but I believe in it and I hope you do too
<3
 

(and if not dw ill just kms....just kidding lol. I just really miss making these specific types of inside jokes with you.. we used to do it a lot...I hope you can still remember a few.....remember the power hands lmao)

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